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Dave Bonta
The good foot is put
into a suspense of joy:
out and up. Am I
a lunk to think
my life as a puppet
is pleasant,
among mere sticks
knocking the strings?
You caught me in your net of wishful hoping,
Pinned me down with needles and pins
You didn't check if I was dead first but let me feel all the pain that you had in store for me,
Why was it that you took me from my natural habitat and stripped me down until I was your definition of clean,
Let me be pressed down onto your emotions that soaked me of guilt and grief,
Then letting me dry out until I was numb
You glued me down to a back frame and let me be framed in the walls of your home,
Where no one entered and you kept me to yourself,
You took my beauty out to fit your needs
they stripped me of everything
so now i can't help but pull the strings
of others
Guess what ?
I'm done .
This is over .
I don't miss you and
I don't think I ever did .
I just didn't want them to prove me right .
But I'm done .
Playing your games
Going at each others throats over and over again just because we're both too stubborn .
And mostly letting you control me .
Because I don't even like you or love you anymore.
I just needed to be right .
Stop blaming me because I can't get high grades
Stop comparing me to my other cousins
Stop saying that Im so far from you when you were a teen
Stop comparing that you're more beautiful than me
Stop dictating me whom partner should I choose
Stop bullying me to my classmates
Stop making me feel so small
Stop controlling me that I can't even hang out my cousins
Stop comparing me to other girls
Stop unders estimating me
Stop blaming me when you have a bad days
Stop blaming me everything was my fault
Stop being insecure
Stop arguing me when crisis comes
I tried.
This isn't at all what I had planned
I just meant for it to be a small thing
I never wanted it to be this bad
The winds have gone from a gentle breeze to a thrashing gale
The rain has opened and is pelting the ground
Nothing ever goes to plan around here
It's always best to believe the worst
No luck will be found here
Just a confused expression sitting upon the ledge
I thought I had everything under control
I though all the cards would play out right
But this isn't what I have planned
I can't imagine life without it though