Anne Finch’s poem stages a conversation between two women, Ephelia and Ardelia, about the nature of friendship. Ephelia asks for a definition, and Ardelia first gives a plain, affectionate answer: “’Tis to love, as I love You.” When Ephelia presses for something fuller, Ardelia launches into grand, self-sacrificing promises—sharing all joy and grief, mortgaging house and land, even dying on a friend’s grave. Ephelia gently pushes back: these lofty ideals are beautiful but hardly new. Can Ardelia say something more?
Ardelia’s final reply circles right back to her first words: friendship simply is to love as she loves Ephelia. The poem suggests that no lavish declaration can pin true friendship down—its real measure is a personal, lived devotion. The mood feels intimate and playful, like a gentle teasing between close friends, leaving the sense that genuine affection always escapes the limits of language.