She speaks directly to a deeply loved person who is gone — likely dead — and feels a defiant joy: the pain of loss earned her the release of reunion, each step of suffering a small death moving toward paradise. She asks pardon for using her “old fashioned Eyes,” mortal ones, but they are better than any new sight because they saw the beloved in life and were seen in return. Her hazel eyes are witnesses that the features remain the same in eternity. The beloved was fleeting in presence, infinite in absence — an Eastern vision dismissed at dawn. The height of that presence equalled the hills, while its loss notched her soul like floodwater on a turning wheel. This haunting memory persists until time drops its final decade, then actualizes into a reality lasting at least eternity. The mood mingles grief with exultation: pain itself becomes a treasured merit, a proof of love’s depth.
Joy to have merited the Pain -- — Summary
Joy to have merited the Pain -- To merit the Release -- Joy to have perished every step -- To Compass Paradise --
Pardon -- to look upon thy face -- With these old fashioned Eyes -- Better than new -- could be -- for that -- Though bought in Paradise --
Because they looked on thee before -- And thou hast looked on them -- Prove Me -- My Hazel Witnesses The features are the same --
So fleet thou wert, when present -- So infinite -- when gone -- An Orient's Apparition -- Remanded of the Morn --
The Height I recollect -- 'Twas even with the Hills -- The Depth upon my Soul was notched -- As Floods -- on Whites of Wheels --
To Haunt -- till Time have dropped His last Decade away, And Haunting actualize -- to last At least -- Eternity --