James Stephens offers playful, tender advice to a young man nervous about courtship. The speaker’s tone is knowing but warm, as if coaching someone through the contradictions of early love: be humble enough to see her as almost out of reach, yet brave enough to keep moving closer. He warns against extremes—not pushy, not cold—and tells the would-be lover to ignore his overthinking and act with gentle confidence. The second stanza shifts into a soft, almost ritual set of commands: hold her hand, meet her eyes, stay near her, begin with a humble kiss on her fingertip. There’s a light, slightly teasing confidence here, but also real affection. The closing lines feel like a charm or a promise—surrender comes not from force, but from patient, reverent attention. The mood is old-fashioned, intimate, and encouraging, mixing awe with a quiet certainty that nerve and tenderness will win her.
Sir Youthful Anxious — Summary
What to do When you woo, Listen and I'll tell it you. Deep humility must teach That the star's beyond your reach, Yet must courage raise your heart To the conqueror's lofty part. Not too forward, shyly bold. Not too hot, but never cold. Fearing still to tread too near, Treading nigher, spite of fear. Laying all your logic down As you pick your manhood up, Disbelieving every frown, Intent always on the cup.
Hold her hand, Hold her gaze, Always stand In her ways ; Humbly kiss Her finger-tip ; She'll surrender You her lip.