poison woven into tissue,
sepsis radiating from the site
where unspoken words putrefy
in anger and hope, toxifying
blood, anxious for salve.
dreams and wishes withering
under reality’s hot sun, lost;
an empty hole in a brick wall
betraying its completion;
absence yearning for touch.
desire unnamed, the chafing
of which tears the hole wider,
fraying thread and loosening
buttons until the entire fabric
compels thorough refashioning.
a deep wound beginning to heal,
I strain at the cords
by which you’ve bound me.
Bodily I am yours.
You want more.
You want the great blooming
welts to point the way to a love that claims all.
With coffeehot soothing hands
you take as much as you can
and give me everything I need.
You give me your darkness, your darkest,
mysteriously proud I can take it
and transform it into starbursts.
How can this miracle be?
In place of a gnawing blankness
there is now the wriggling of joyous worms entwined.
View is free of early birds and full of nightbloomed flowers;
love hate
begin from the same
dismay
a breath of solitude
the countries
that fall apart
in a wanton breaking
of pairs
we should fall
further
in the sweet act
of lesion
the fingers loosening
the legs awake
moving
the eyes
In the room farther away
than a window
I am alone
taken of myself
cross-steps
reach the other
side is all I must
and I am alone
to dissolve rocks under
my naked eyes
cornered aslant
this wall huge with sleep
feeds on dark air
and I am alone
how still the mouth
of desire
A tired white
old nag
standing forlorn
Among sagebrush
on a cold day
are his thoughts
Only of the cold
the weariness
how would he feel
With his belly
full of straw
in a warm stable
Would he then
be thinking
of young mares
Disquiet
If memory were only in the head
(do not sleep more than once
with any one
the body is a stupid red neck
you try to reason
bang! comes the fist
down on the table
the red neck sees red:
get me that body now!
the body is a crabby baby
that wants
wants with a vengeance
that body
the baby thinks that body
is the bottle
the baby goes on a fast
away falling forever
inky curtain of non-existent thread
from invisible webs stars glistening
and of frosted sweat long bedsheet clouds
(sweet sweat
of early morning struggles)
these hang over tree tops
sleeping women
sleeping men
empty beer bottles
distant roads
the night a woman
beautiful & black
like sea gulls
her hair
across my faces glides silently
Will you not squeeze
the thumb
of my hand
bite it
and watch
my eyes
at the same time
and
my mouth
please enter
my mouth
please enter
anywhere
you fit in
The first word is, of course
To Eat - manger, or The Manger, masticate and nourish, devour,
rob-from-the-landscape, transform, sharpen the gums,
or the teeth, fill the hole with parts of the world,
stuff the anger, engender energy, manipulate fleshy
objects, drain, suck, take away some of mum, milk is
to eat what water is to bleed---mmmmmmm
The second word is
To sleep - Dormir, dormant, schlep, do-do, dip into silence,
drown the brain, empty the wrists, multiply, rock
in God, to fade away, to say goodbye world, to be
smashed by space, ground under the wing of mercury,
find Cinderella's shoe, to sleep is to stilskin, to threeblind
-mice, to sleep is to do the no-no
The third word is
i want you
under open sky
the sun in your
forehead & spread hair
the grass around your thighs
making no mistakes
of roundness
i want you in
water & the air
i want you
as long as there is
ocean
on the same earth
i want the
feel of under you
a planet
I saw you again,
Holy shit.
The feelings tried to crawl back but I didn't let them,
Not this time.
But damn was it hard,
Damn how much I wanna love you,
Damn how much I wanna hold you,
But that can't happen, it won't, and I know it never will.
What good are my eyes,
if I can’t see your face.
When you enter a room,
my pulse picks up pace.
That’s me crawling,
under your skin.
One word at a time,
searching for sin.
Together we’ll make it,
all the way to the top.
I just can’t help myself,
please don’t ask me to stop.