busy morning
at home in the almost
midnight ear
Hundreds of ladybugs huddle together
in clumps in the corners where wall
& ceiling meet. I point the black tube
like a magic wand, a reverse rifle,
& the beetles disappear with the briefest of rattles
down the vacuum’s plastic throat.
This is nothing like hunting, no meditative wait,
no tense silence or rush of adrenaline.
Snuffing out these house invaders, I feel nothing.
I am alone with the sound of the cleaner,
which cancels out every competing thought.
If there were sound in space, a star
would howl like this when it collapsed into itself:
detritus from the ceiling, meet the detritus from the floor.
Bright clot of color, flame,
here’s a sackful of dust in which to gutter.
Imagine having to go on with no way to touch.
Giving birth to the child of who knows which
stoned soldier, & never knowing the silky
feel of his skin, whether to caress
or to shove away, away.
I let him nurse to ease the swelling in my breasts.
I licked him like a cat — it was all the salt I could get.
Were they not terrible, those severed hands,
when they stood back up at last
& began to point?
I am finite as my picture frame
I sit full of shadows
and break my neck looking
over my shoulder
at a loss how we all come to be
in a new rogue world
ravens hang out
in dead hope of an ox
full of news and folly
which will keep them all winter
full of midnight
settling into a bed thin as a purse
flee fight flee flee
flee flee flee flee
FIGHT flee fight flee
flee flee flee fight
fight fight fight flee
fight flee fight
I am in the oven
a whole month hungry
I hunt a new country under the ice
on my right eye
There was a flash, so bright — as if
from the world’s largest camera,
come to capture everyone in
their work clothes.
We children ran to the top field
& turned & looked.
What new kind of cloud was this?
What new kind of tree?
It stood for hours on the horizon,
brewing its own weather, we guessed,
or setting fruit. No one could imagine just
how strong the wind, how terrible the rain.
But we were farmers’ kids.
When we saw white birds
streaming away toward the west,
we knew what to think.
off on and off again
an outfit for view at night
could I understand
what I could not stand
forced to go to bed and give
the night a night
to master my mind
unfounded as a country
made for war
I get spiritual about liver
that lone wing
like a dark home
settling accounts with someone below
the din of ice
busy as we eat
supper and news