the debts I shed eat
one little bit of me
they come for an account
of my general fear
and I a broke bard
change it into more useful letters
I’ve been so swamped, I took
a mental health day, called in sick.
My poems are dwindling like unused
extra fingers. But the signs
weren’t good: first the car
that wouldn’t start, then no heat
in the apartment. And in between
the therapist saying you have to learn
to let go. Hell, I barely made it
to the appointment. How can I relax
when my mechanic charges twice
as much as my therapist? I ask
the radiator repairman, can’t you fix it
so it doesn’t knock?
I need things to be simpler than they are.
Today my car still isn’t running
after dinner the news
beyond all expectation of ease
in a hole
a furious storm
the river is too much
to be governed by art or order
it riots
sits
seems easy
unsettled as a crow
in plague time
the night is a garden
in her perfect fear of us
who rave that everything must break
while government continues
what will become of doing business
with so busy a rust
I find more than ground
or grief under me
among other things the damned
a sea of feathers
plain blood
the legs and body
of a tick
against the whole table
a tooth of night
pointed at any
glut of mirth
fear finds me out
and brings me a bear
or the desire for order
it burdens my mind that it should be so backward
so unseeing
so nappish
yet I am nothing else
but that now-frozen weather
I walk the dog
my mind full of work
by a river full of ice
dark lodgings
a board with my name on it
a survey
is asking nothing
I answer nothing for fear
of it being me
I hear so much by chance
a fat plum of a bark
a passionate vapor
and one who with ash and dagger
has moved in under my bed
I would borrow a lost god
to hinder me with a hard
and slippery light
I invite guests
meaning to be merry for
I could not be alone
whatever I am is naked
and would have stayed out
all night