Sitting — Summary

Sitting, Thinking time is the only way To truly move it on Remembering that it was only yesterday And only yesterday was just A million light years Ahead of it’s time Crying on a call Situated between daydream And father time How I fought to keep the secret of How he would fail And how falling was merely The weight of his cross Anchoring him To his mother’s side This great mythic blast Into the vast, big white sky Into all that I could ever throw Against the moon And beyond the stars Shifting feet but By no means walking Afraid to drink in the atmosphere But it’s like this anywhere And everywhere Fine line Covered up by miles of eagerness And aspirations Of gaining ground And the simple girl With rainbows and fairy dust And with absolutely nothing From the heart But a quiet sort of promise broken So it’s every morning Waking up to a day that leads To nowhere And then it finds me Drowning and selling what I have Last on the list but never on the floor And circles trace the outlines Of the twisted nights before Lighting myself with fire To melt me into form Turn me into something And I’m beautiful, I’m beautiful Yet pricking finger tips Drip like fate Against the night And beyond the grip Of everything I reveal Of seasons and of accidents To that which I conceal Taking now To just Sitting

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Jen Czahur's "Sitting" is about being stuck. The speaker sits and thinks, caught between memory and daydream, while time seems to rush past and stall at once. She says she is "shifting feet but by no means walking," which sums up the feeling of motion without progress.

The poem moves through scattered images: a man who falls, a girl with "rainbows and fairy dust," a broken promise, mornings that lead "to nowhere." The speaker seems torn between big ambitions ("all that I could ever throw against the moon") and a sense that she has little real feeling behind them. The fire that might "melt me into form" suggests a wish to be remade, and her repeated "I'm beautiful" sounds more like self-persuasion than confidence.

The mood is restless, tired, and a little sad. The ending returns to the opening word, "Sitting," as if she has circled back to where she began, with nothing resolved.

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