she sits there, with a fake smile — Summary

A young girl sat in class Reading the handout the teacher gave her A young boy is throwing paper and calling her names The teacher doesnt notice Too busy talking to another student She tries to ignore him Its getting louder, in her head Finally the bell rings She is allowed to leave Its the end of the day She goes outside The words still sat in her mind She shakes her head to clear them She hears the boy and his friends behind her She tightens her grip on her bag They shout at her if he can have the homework She gives them the homework She turns and walks away He calls her cute Smart Funny She believes every word The next day it happens again She gives him the homework in exchange for his fake words She smiles when she goes home This continues until one day she found he didnt need the homework anymore Its the last day of the year Their last year He got high marks in his exams Now he is off to a great college She is not going to see him again He doesnt thank her He doesnt even look at her He just walks past Like he is he top dog She feels broken Realising she has been used She goes home that night She cries She cries outloud Knowing her parents wont be home for ages "Im just like paper, i get used then thrown away" She repeats this She suddenly blacks out Dehydration or the pills she took before she sat down Her parents come home to find a body Of their beautiful daughter only aged 18 Dead In her bedroom With a not saying But i loved you

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The poem follows a girl who is bullied at school and mistakes a boy's attention for kindness. He mocks her in class, then calls her cute, smart and funny once she hands over her homework. She believes him, so she keeps giving him what he wants, and the exchange becomes her daily routine. On the last day of the year he no longer needs her. He walks past without a glance, and she realises she was only ever useful to him.

The mood starts out tense and ordinary, then turns bleak. The short, flat lines make the story feel like a report of events, which makes the ending hit harder. The girl's feelings are loneliness, hope and then heartbreak. Her line about being "just like paper" echoes the paper thrown at her earlier. The poem ends with her death and a note saying she loved him, leaving the reader with grief and anger at how little the boy noticed. The title's discarded flowers suggest something bought cheaply and then thrown away.

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