your home address

i can't avoid you when i know your address like the back of my hand. i can't just move far away from you if i still know how to get there and where to turn to find you. i could move thousands of miles away from you, but i still know the small tiny town of edgewater and how to navigate around the shores and how the street names are alphabetical and the blocks skip by twos. i can't delete your number if i know it by heart. always a number i want to call in the middle of the day to see if you're doing okay. i can change my number, i can even block yours if i wanted to. but i still know it. i can still always dial it up. i still check my phone to see your name in it. i can delete all of the photos and videos but it doesn't get rid of the memories. i can try to drink them away, but even totally plastered i still remember that night. i don't think drinking will make it go away. your body only replaces all the skins cells every 7 years so for the next 6 years, 7 months and 26 days, your touch will still be on me. you're still here. holding my hand pulling my hair kissing my lips hands around my throat skin under my fingernails hands holding my pelvis down you're going to be everywhere on my body for the next 6 odd years. sure i can dye my roots and chop my hair but if it doesn't permanently get rid of you, why even bother trying? i can cover my body with tattoos, but underneath you're still there. you're always going to be here even after 7 years.