The speaker is making a list of promises to themselves, and every stanza begins with the same word: "Promissed." The repetition feels like someone trying to talk themselves into feeling better. They want to let go of their emotions, be stronger, hold on longer than before, find some purpose, and live in joy.
But the promises sound less certain than they first appear. The speaker wants to throw their feelings "away from me," which suggests they see those feelings as a burden. The line "as to what I am doing here" hints at a deeper confusion about their place in the world. The ending is the most unsettling part: "Not destroy / Myself as I wish to" can be read as admitting a pull toward self-harm, or at least self-destruction, that the speaker is fighting against. The poem also stops without a full stop, which leaves it feeling unresolved.
The mood is tired, fragile and quietly hopeful. It reads like a private pep talk from someone who badly wants to believe it.