«For the one I hardly knew. Forgive me, I don’t…» — Summary

For the one I hardly knew. Forgive me, I don’t know what else to do…

Today I read the last words you ever wrote:

it was a diary of your feelings

& your last poem…

You wrote so beautifully about the sky between

sentences expressing a tiredness so deep

you just wanted to die.

Knowing I failed to help you lift your head

more often; to help ease your burden;

to love you as you deserved to be.

Now there is no way to say sorry

& stay with you in that other world

you wrote of in you last poem,

one you wrote for me…

despite being only another drunk,

an idiot, rare & wild only to you,

yet even I could see with these

eyes of “ever changing colour”

how delicately, intricately woven you were

before your threads

fell away.

on the wind

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Written as a message to someone the speaker "hardly knew," the poem is an apology that arrives too late. The speaker has just read the person's last diary entries and final poem, in which they described a deep tiredness and a wish to die. Reading them now, the speaker is overwhelmed by guilt: they feel they didn't do enough to help, to ease the burden, or to love the person as they deserved.

The speaker's feelings are tangled. There is grief and regret, but also tenderness. Calling themselves "another drunk" and "an idiot," they seem to doubt their own worth, yet they also admit they saw how "delicately, intricately woven" the person was. The image of threads falling away "on the wind" suggests a life unravelling and drifting off.

The mood is quiet, raw and sorrowful. Short, broken lines and trailing ellipses make it feel like halting speech, as if the speaker can hardly find words and is simply trying to say sorry anyway.

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