Slammed

I have a nasty habit from Years of being anthropophobic See, the problem is that I'm a liar. I frequently lie about how busy I am. I prefer to say that I'm "slammed". I like using that lie in particular. I'm slammed. Sounds like I was hit by a car. Or a brick. Or maybe a ball. It sounds like an injury, And an injury requires immediate care and rest. I required immediate care and rest when I cried. I cried my heart out when I was suddenly "Slammed" with the news that I'm still a depressed piece of shit. I get "slammed" with news like that All the time. Now, when I think of being "slammed", I think of the time my dad Smacked me across the face while we fought. I think of the time my little brother Said he wished I was dead. I think of being "slammed" by the words "So you really don't love us" Racing out of my mother's mouth To run me over like that aforementioned car As I explain that I can't come back home Without feeling "slammed". I don't want my friends to see me When I'm slammed. My face is swollen from being smashed into By this lie that isolates me further. I can't breathe through my nose Because of snot and a racing heart. Telling someone I'm "slammed" says "Hey... I'm a little busy... Try again later" Without telling them what has Really slammed into me.