Inside-Out — Summary

Dave BontaContemplative

It’s false, the world we carry inside us, like a stone in a chicken’s crop, that false tooth. The winter light; the red haze of maple buds just beginning to swell; the story in the paper about the walled-off beach in Haiti where cruise ships disgorge their passengers without telling them where they are, & the local man interviewed for the story says They want to come here, because they’ve been everywhere else & my country is the loveliest of all – it hurts, this world, it makes us ache with longing. And yet no amount of saliva will grow a pearl around it, because it is not the real world, which we do not know.

But the world knows us. It doesn’t stop where we do, at the fingertips, doesn’t get sidetracked in the labyrinths of lung & gut. We glow in its shadow the way the moon glows, lurid, during an eclipse. It seeds us with cities, this world that was once a womb. When we die, the abandoned residents eat themselves out of house & home.

Like the wish hiding in the wishbone, I take my own sweet time. If you want to see me sooner, stand between two mirrors turned to face each other. Though the antibodies will all muster out, crane your neck as best you can, look over their shoulders. There at the end of the tunnel: that darkness. A hint of stars.

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Dave Bonta's poem starts with a bleak claim: the world we carry in our heads is false, like a stone a chicken swallows to help it digest. It is a substitute we mistake for the real thing. The speaker sets lovely details, like winter light and swelling maple buds, beside a newspaper story about a cruise-ship beach in Haiti, where tourists are never told where they are. That fake, walled-off paradise becomes a picture of how we experience everything. We ache for the world, yet we never know it.

The second section turns this around. The world knows us, reaches past our bodies, and even "seeds us with cities," which seems to mean the bacteria and organisms living inside us. When we die, they devour what is left. The final section is more playful and strange. The speaker says he takes his "own sweet time," then imagines two facing mirrors and a tunnel of reflections. At its end sit darkness and "a hint of stars." The mood moves from longing and unease to a wry, quiet wonder.

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