At Table . . .

At table, feet must be flat on the floor. Don't cross your legs. If something's spilled, ignore It. Spread your napkin out, first thing, across Your lap. Eat some of all. It's your loss If you don't. Why once I couldn't eat An oyster raw, and now—what a treat! Don't fidget when your uncle says long blessing; He means it all. Besides, he's always stressing You to God. You should be glad you've got So many relatives who care a lot About you. When you've finished eating and Must go, excuse yourself before you stand. This is how a gentleman should act. It's manners now but later will be tact.

So spoke my Mother, many and many a time, These words, adultly, only not with rhyme, And guiltily I sit today, to eat, Not minding my napkin right or my truant feet, But nevertheless I know, as I used to know What was sin and, where the comma should go.