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Dave Bonta
I could not go to church
except in my closet
wing of my evening
up with that cold cold eye
I work and sweat to get away
itching
all foot and fin
I am who I fear seeing
in my closet at night
mold in my closet
and all my clothes lost
her fine linen green
as water
that run-away bride
out of my mind
I sat in my closet
no world called to me
but a clock
My mind was
another ear
with no one
to read to it,
an ache taken
for a walk.
It was dark
in my closet.
The little box of war in the office,
my paper voyage…
nothing filled my closet
as high as night.
I went to Twickenham to sit
I went to Twickenham to think
alone in a closet
I played on my flageolet
till the bell-man came by with his bell
and left my wife and the maid a-washing still.
I don't like being around my dad
Cause he made me walk the dog with him
And forced me to explain.
So I told him everything about Parker
And how he might never talk to me again.
I really hope he does,
Because I finally made him a name.
If Park never gets to hear it
I'll scream it in the rain.
Right now I'm hiding in my closet
Fighting an internal war.
It's me against anxiety-
My defenses suck so far.
Because of this, I've long since been a
Fan of small spaces
Many times, I've made my bed in the
Nooks and crannies of those people
Who were more attractive than me
Or stronger than me,
Those who could stand up to bullies
Instead of tucking their head down and
Trying to be small
But being small is what gets
So many of us into this mess
I hated being weak, because weak made me
Be small and small made me be weak
And so I found a place
Where I could be small and weak
And it was still okay
the lightbulb out. That's tough!
Tomorrow I'll buy a 100 Watt job
and screw it in. So what's darkness
among four walls. The whole earth
in the closet next to the icebox.