It floods a room,
Exposing lies.
It shows you that day has arrived.
It chases shadows,
It reveals dreams,
It shows you what darkness cannot see.
It pierces the clouds,
That cover us.
Burning all I have to trust.
Be gone, light,
From this dark heart.
I have too many hidden scars.
Don't show them,
What I have concealed.
For I will drown in my own tears.
How might we know
when a star dies?
(they leave their lights on)
sitting here waiting
for the light to turn green and
the world to make sense again
i suddenly realized
each hazy blur of traffic passing by
each blasting radio preaching The Word
each teeny-tiny passenger on that teeny-tiny airplane
is telling an epic story of a world
full of thousands of paths to thousands of other lives
in which i am nothing
I feel my heart flutter in my chest
Its normally quite dead
But somehow
She managed to start it again
I don't take these days for granted
For I know my time is fleeting
I have to make the most if this
Because I know in the bottom of my heart
You'll never be mine
We don't have anything
Nothing but our memories
But even they are washed away
By the Lost Sea
It doesn't matter how much you or I try
Using what little strength I have left
I sit up in these white sheets
I was in awe whenever she smiled.
Not because of how chalk-white
her nice teeth were, but how her smile always found a way
to be an accurate representation of perfection and innocence.
I mean...no matter how dark it was in my life,
She would simply smile
and everything dark would be devoured by the light illuminating from it.
Everything is fine
Or that’s how it seems to be
Nothing is wrong
That’s what others think of me
Everything is happy
When I play my cards right
Nothing is sad
If we talk while there is light
Everything is joyful
Because I talk about random things
Nothing is depressing
Covered in my mask, so clean
Everything is random
I make it so
Nothing makes sense
If I accidentally make a row
A lightshow of colors
Looks like a building
that just blew up
One hits
Colorful explosions happen
The world-
Now only colorful lights and explosions
Like blinking lights, on-off, on-off
Flickering lamps, wicks burning out
Nobody to pour in love
Nobody to keep it alive.
What if the lights fade out
And die,
What if the lamp goes dry
What does it matter to one
Born blind....
Enjoying nature
Enjoying forests, birds and the breeze
Enjoying music, reading, traveling
Enjoying looking, listening, feeling, touching –
I realize -
More than this joyful spread before me
More joyous is this gift, so special,
To find joy, to discover beauty
In matters all, piddling and profound.
Deprived, denied of everything
Of riches, of senses
Even in darkness I will remember
The light, oh life, you shed on me.
I will hope and wait
With the glow of happy memories
Warming, keeping me alive.
No tone in your voice,
No words to be heard,
No emotions to be felt,
No gestures to be observed,
Attention fleeting,
Time condensed,
Easily distracted,
Seemingly entranced,
You scan and stare,
Unable to look away,
Hypnotized by the light,
Addicted to the immediacy,
When I call your name,
You irritatingly look up,
With a deer-in-the-headlights stare,
Robotic in your emotions,
Pushed into a dark hole,
Unable to find my way out,
Farther down the hole I fall,
Not knowing when I'll stop,
Numbness fills my body,
Pain has overtaken me,
Unable to walk, travel, work,
Wishing I was unable to breathe,
I fall further down the hole,
My mood does likewise,
Seemingly hitting rock bottom,
Until I saw your face,
A light shines through,
A rope is thrown down,
As I climb to the top,
What I felt was lost has been found,
Illusive whiteness covers the ground
on the happiest of them all.
Fantastic. Festive. Familiar.
Where there are joyful faces, lit with expectation, lit with innocence and hope.
Where there is wishful thinking and dreaming, perhaps, for the daylight to make all their needs into flesh and blood.
Flesh. And blood.
On the happiest of them all, the fog, the dim light, the cold silent darkness is subduing the image.
My image.
On the happiest of them all, my bones ache and my muscles are tearing.
I apologize.
For you to have remembered the features of my face.
For kind, soft words we've spoken so many times.
For being the representation of a lot less than you deserve.
I apologize.