ashes to ashes — Summary

i have completely erased your footprints in my room, replacing them with the ash that now circulates in this space i can only call my own. memories, from the ash of one they arise, to the ash of another they fall, the soil is overturned, exposing the fresh life within old earth. your scent seeps into my bloodstream, infusing into sunken- in memories now remembered in sepia. its touch clings to my cold hands, the air-con hums again at 23 degrees, the bed is ever too high, the curtains are drawn once more, the scent of sweat mixes in a ironic concoction of deja vu and hopefulness — i feel your heartbeat through that semblance of a link through the heated cloth on my skin. i breathe and i gulp in senseless amounts of the fresh air, new ash; it clings to my throat, clings to my body, clings onto my heartstrings and never to let go.

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The speaker says they have wiped every trace of a former lover from their room, but the poem quickly shows that erasing is not the same as forgetting. The footprints are gone, yet what replaces them is ash, and the ash keeps stirring up memories. Scent, touch, the hum of the air-con at 23 degrees, the bed that is too high, the drawn curtains: ordinary details return like a ritual being repeated, and the speaker feels both deja vu and a flicker of hope.

The mood is heavy, intimate and a little suffocating. Memories are tinted in sepia, and the speaker seems to feel the other person's heartbeat through warm cloth, as if the link is half real, half imagined. By the end, even fresh air becomes "new ash" that clings to the throat, body and heartstrings. The title's "ashes to ashes" fits: the speaker wants to move on but ends up carrying the loss in every breath.

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