The speaker keeps circling back to one admission: "I'm just scared." The opening two lines set up a pattern. They say they can speak their mind and do what they want, but fear cancels out that freedom. The word "just" makes the fear sound small, as if they're trying to brush it off, though it clearly isn't small at all.
The middle of the poem names what they dread: being abandoned, like "the others," with someone turning away for good. There's a bitter note of resignation in "I knew it would happen at some point," as though the speaker has been bracing for loss all along. Then comes a twist. The speaker admits they left first, without a proper goodbye, and they hate themselves for it. Leaving seems to have been a way of getting hurt on their own terms. The mood is raw and anxious, plain-spoken and quietly guilty, and the final repeated "scared" leaves the feeling unresolved.