Impasse with a Walnut — Summary

Philip WexlerContemplative

Shuffling through the damp leaf litter, I look more down

than ahead. Scattered walnuts, intact and in pieces.

I pick up an empty half-husk, the nutmeat settling, I imagine,

into the belly of the squirrel taking stock from a branch

overhead. The shell surface, sinuously crinkled, resembles

a rough netsuke carving of a woman in a kimono

turning her back to me. Flipping the nut over,

we meet face to face, hers a cameo in the concave

interior, eyes black and silent, hair bun run through

with a long wooden pin I wait for her voice to give me

a signal, a clue, some direction but hear only the hollow echo

of absence and outside, in the wind, a rustling

I can’t pinpoint. Back in the nut, her face has become

a softly scalloped ear, all ear, wordlessly imploring me

to speak my mind, but I am speechless too, and ever

at a loss, with nothing to declare. Mutually mute,

our standoff is assured. I toss the walnut aside.

A woodpecker flies off with it. Continuing

on my way, I dare not reach for another.

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A man walks through damp leaves, eyes on the ground, and picks up a walnut shell. Its wrinkled surface starts to look like a carved figure of a woman in a kimono with her back turned. When he flips it over, he finds her face inside, with black eyes and a pin through her hair. He waits for her to say something, to point him somewhere, but he hears only emptiness and an unplaceable rustling in the wind.

The face then turns into a scalloped ear, as if the shell is waiting for him to speak. He can't. Neither of them has anything to say, and the speaker admits he is "ever at a loss." So he tosses the walnut away, and a woodpecker carries it off.

The mood is quiet, wry, and a little lonely. The speaker longs for guidance but finds only his own silence reflected back. His final caution about picking up another nut feels both funny and sad.

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