«Here i am again…» — Summary

Here i am again Drowning Crying And screaming

I'm drowning in a sea of black, blue and red Crying until my head hurts and I am numb and screaming to a void that doesn't seem to listen and doesn't seem to care

I'm drowning in my depression Crying black tears And screaming for help

I'm begging to gods I don't believe in, to end this pain, but all I hear is silence The ever so loud silence Its so loud Stop Stop Please stop I can't take this anymore

Show the whole poemHide the poem

Learn Poems app

Try the Learn Poems app

Everything from the website trainer, and more: new exercises, voice recording and sharing, reminders, quick review.

Victor's untitled poem is a raw, direct cry from someone in the middle of depression. The speaker repeats three words, drowning, crying and screaming, and then spends the poem unpacking each one. The opening "Here i am again" suggests this isn't the first time the speaker has felt this way, which makes the pain seem tiring as well as sharp.

The images are simple but heavy. A "sea of black, blue and red" turns emotion into colour and water, and "black tears" shows grief that feels dark and unclean. The speaker screams into a "void" that doesn't listen or care, and even begs gods they don't believe in, a sign of how desperate they are. What comes back is only silence, described as "ever so loud," a contradiction that captures how empty quiet can feel unbearable.

The ending breaks down into short, pleading lines: "Stop / Stop / Please stop." The mood is overwhelming and exhausted, with no comfort offered, which leaves the reader sitting inside the speaker's despair.

Read also

More by victor

All poems
Sadvictor

* * *

And every time you wanted to cry. Every time you wanted to die. I was there. I was there for you.
Sadvictor

* * *

I remember when I was younger, I would see people with dull eyes but happy faces. And I couldn't understand why. I remember when I was younger I saw a girl with scars on her arms. And my mom said that she did that too herself.
Anxiousvictor

* * *

Skip another meal i'm fine Turn up the music a little louder i'm fine