I walk away, along the riverbank
thinking that I'll be okay,
never to return, footsteps
that lead away from the city lights
and no one can tell me to stay
because no one's in my head,
and no one sees myself like I do.
No one knows my fate,
and no one sees the journey I face.
If they did, they'd turn away,
losing hope for me,
but who is there to say
there's no more hope for me?
Next day, I look around to see
just how far I came,
never to return, footsteps
one of my friends walked up to me today,
and he said "you gotta love depression"
then he pulled back his sleeves to show me his wrists.
i think im going to cry
if i dont save this life.
i didnt even know i had one to save
the last time a classmate did it,
so now that i know
im going to try my hardest.
lacey, dont kill yourself.
its not worth it.
youll be okay,
i promise.
im here for you.
I’ve never seen your face,
Nor heard your voice,
Yet feel I know you,
Through your written words,
Having never looked into your eyes,
Nor heard you laugh,
Never have I seen you smile,
Yet are feeling so close,
My imagination illustrates a picture,
Its accuracy unknown,
My mind left to wonder,
Who you really are,
Words typed on a screen,
No expressions or gestures displayed,
No tears or laughs can be seen,
No tone of voice heard,
I'm tempted to just smack you across your face.
Your perfect face.
That I've wasted smiling at for years now.
Did you even know that I loved you?
That I dreamt about kissing you senseless,
And wanting you to crave me,
For your heart to ache for me.
I've wasted years on you.
Years I surely won't get back.
Years you teased me,
Planted hope in my heart that would only wither away in the end.
I should slap you.
But you'd probably enjoy that.
Because then you'd win
And you don't deserve that satisfaction.
You told me,
Maybe
What does that even mean?
Have you not had to time to decide yes or no?
Do you really need more time thinking?
Or is this just some way of filling me with nonexistent hope?
Your a bastard.
But you probably already knew that.
Just like you knew that,
Maybe
Was an anchor of hope.
i fell for it,
hook line and sinker,
because how can you ignore a lie
when it's exactly what you needed to hear?
This night is so dark
With shining stars
How my heart is dark
With small hopes
They say stars are dead
My hopes too
Even though they shine bright
Like mine do
I knew they were useless
But i mind
I never let them go
Because I can't
Never get them off away
Oh My heart
Stupid heart! Let them go
Let's never hope .
My camera has auto focus; switch it on, point, press -
It focuses on its own
All you have to do is to press down all the way.
Of late, the auto focus doesn't work.
I pull the focus ring manually, forward and backward
It never focuses sharply.
This is the only camera I have; guess I will have to live
With images blurred.
To buy a new one is not an option
Till the next life, if there is one.
But I do take out my camera everyday
Brush it and blow away the dust
Tweak it here and there
Imagine sharp and clear images.
One day, it might snap back to life.
What I could normally see,
I can see no more,
Blind to what stares me in the face,
My vision suddenly blurred,
Others hand me aids,
To help me see more clearly,
Clouded in too much thought,
Fearful of my feelings,
My literacy like that of a newborn,
Unable to see what’s in front of me,
Analyzing every last detail,
To learn how to read,
Mixed signals come my way,
As optimism and pessimism collide,
Hope that history does not repeat itself,
Yet doubts enter my mind,
Pushed into a dark hole,
Unable to find my way out,
Farther down the hole I fall,
Not knowing when I'll stop,
Numbness fills my body,
Pain has overtaken me,
Unable to walk, travel, work,
Wishing I was unable to breathe,
I fall further down the hole,
My mood does likewise,
Seemingly hitting rock bottom,
Until I saw your face,
A light shines through,
A rope is thrown down,
As I climb to the top,
What I felt was lost has been found,
I hope that someday
I can discover something
A new creature, maybe
"stay strong"
Well i promise im trying.
I promise they every day i wake up hoping that it's better than the last.
I wake up and say today we will pull ourself together.
Just to fall apart when i hear your voice.