i wish i was still in the back of your mind
like you are mine.
so when i call you
it's like temptation calling you.
but you just keep pressing decline.
does your heart feel lighter now that i'm not there?
now that i'm walking away.
i'm accepting that you are water slipping through my fingers and i just cannot hold onto you no matter how desperately i try to grasp onto you.
i miss your true colors,
but i'm still finding out more and more about you.
sometimes you're a bright yellow, that shines as bright as the sun.
some days, you're a dark black that's darker than the skies at 3 a.m
and although i want to love each and every color you show to me,
i just simply can not hold onto you any longer.
i started to love you more than i was loving myself and it's tearing me apart.
i still don't love myself like i love you,
i wake up in the morning
and you're still my first thought.
most mornings, you never even left my mind.
i've been dreaming about you all night as well.
last night in particular,
i never stopped thinking about you.
i went to bed with you on my mind
i dreamt about meeting your family last night and sitting in your lap while you braid my hair as i got ready to go to dinner with them.
and then, this morning at 9:28 am,
i searched my phone to see if you had texted me.
i wish i could tell you every time i dream of you,
but it would be almost every day.
i miss him
no not like how the sun misses the moon because they dont
they have never even met long enough to say that
but i miss him more deeply than that
i miss him like how i miss him
i wonder if you look for songs that remind you of me
i'm looking for parts of you in everything i listen to.
swimming helps with the feeling of suffocation
challenging yourself to be active without air
i love the feeling of the lack of air
when i talk to you, i get the same feeling
i still have air in my lungs but i can't breathe
fuzz and static fills my brain
i cant hear anything
my heart pounds hard in my chest
trying to move oxygen around my body
you make me breathless
the feeling is addicting
i cant get enough
your words wind me
i lose all thoughts
the screen blurs
i'm drowning in love
I am like the cherry blossom that come in spring for a few weeks.
I am the petals that fall and kisses your cheek.
while I fall silently without you hearing me.
I'll say silent till next year till I can't see you anymore
The last time I've seen you was in the beginning of summer,
You were surrounded by friends and I felt like a newcomer,
Even though I've been there for years,
You extroverts brought me to tears.
Several months pass by in a dazed blur and I encounter you
On the exact same place, with the same sweet, beaming smile too
-it is like your trademark, isn't it?
The reason for an annoyed fit.
You speak to a group of people, a tale you found online,
Yet the aura that you have makes it sound purely divine
-the careful pronunciation, as if talking to a friend,
Looking as if you cannot pretend.
A short-term fascination turned into jealousy, and more
-in between my consciousness and dreams, you're on the shore,
Listen,
I promise, you are the only one
Listen,
I promise, you are the only one in my heart
There's no one to love,
there's no one to like
In a dystopian world
where no one's alive
In a town where the cars,
are as empty as your heart
Don't tell me what to do,
Don't tell me what to think
I am your only option
Dust
covers my eyes and see nothing but darkness
Dust
One person can love a machine?
I did it.
Gears...They have rhythmic moves.
Dark brown colour,
gives the papers to the press.
Ever same moves, carefree.
One guy nearby, makes it
control with his hand.
Machine is working honestly non-stop.
It was a press machine...
I watched it with wondered eyes;
That spectre witched me.
In the dark evening near the shop
Machine is working like a carefree snob.
I was watching, but in other hand
My eyes are looking around worried;
I wish for you;
Every night at 11:11.
I don't love you
But I know I could.
It's like I'm standing close to the edge
And I could fling myself over,
All it would take is a leap.
But I don't, because I know
You won't free fall with,
Or catch, Me...
I wish for you;
Every night at 11:11.
Wishing,
That you're wishing for me too.
Burning tears sting my cheeks
Can't you see me
Suffocating in the smoke
The smoke that drowns out all your rationale
Betrayed, heartbroken, lost
You're too intoxicated to see my agony
Too blinded to see your own pitiful reality
Curled up in a corner
Dreaming of a different life
where the world's suffering doesn't poison
the innocent souls of children
It torments me to listen
To your haggard breathing
That seems to whisper help me
I love you but i cannot save you