Adain Michael

Why? Why do I live every day in fear Why do I fear love Why do I fear loving someone Why do I fear getting attached to people Why do I fear life and not death I know why I am numb and afraid of hurting someone The pain I feel is not "normal" for teenagers I don't want to be here On this planet so many call home I don't want to be in this house I call home I don't want to be in this vessel I call a body

I just don't

I miss them

I miss them all The ones I called friends The ones who called me family I miss the laughs and the cries I miss the late nights I would spend with people I thought I loved I miss the fact that so many people loved me And so many people cared And now, now I have No one Nothing All I have is this seemingly ghost town And a black hole for a soul

"You're the love of my life" He told me "I want only you" I believed him "I only need you" I trusted him "I love you, but I have to go for a bit" I didn't see anything suspicious "I'm busy at the moment" I got worried "I'll talk to you later" I got upset "Can't talk" I cried Somedays, no reply. "Sorry I couldn't talk yesterday baby" I wanted to believe him "I missed you" He said three days later "How was your week?" I got a strange message "Hey babe, I gotta go" It said she was also with Matt "Baby, I love you" I got more of them "Don't be mad" There where a total of 19

I saw him Blade to skin Cutting hard and deep He told me to go To leave him alone So I did Not long after that he had attempted to kill himself Because he was sad So was I I did the same A nuse around my neck But I was found By my mother Just as he was

I'm in a room A room so cold All alone In the silent dark Is when the screaming starts I lplay awake Tears on my face Broken glass in my hand The carpet is stained Not with pink Not with yellow Its scarlet just like the glass I know my life won't last For very long You never loved me You never will You say you do I know you don't So fuck you Fuck yourself You lost me, i know it's not much But maybe, just maybe I loved you

The worst feeling in the world Is the feeling of not being loved Weather it be by a parrent Or a partner Or a friend No one loves me Nit even my mother She told me I'm stupid I'm worthess I'm not worth her time Being homless sucked And no body loved me So what's the point of life?