How is it fair? (a poem of envy) 12/20/21 — Summary

how is it fair? how is it fair that you get to be happy and I cant? that she gets the attention I've been wanting for years? That your dreams come true and I'm still here... suffering..without you...

lucky you! you've moved on! you're happier now that what made up my childhood is gone!

Good for you! You're healed! You're a better person now that the old life has been sealed away

Am I to suffer a different fate? One where all I do is wait? Wait to be comfortable happy content

wait to be happy again?

How is that fair? How could you?? How dare you wear that tearable happy smile on your face all the while aware of what has taken place?

I envy you your strength your resilience your ability to get back up again

I wish it were me...I wish I was happy like you...

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Samantha Harper's poem is a raw burst of jealousy and grief aimed at someone who seems to have moved on. The speaker keeps asking "how is it fair?" while feeling stuck, waiting to be happy again, still suffering "without you." The person addressed appears to be tied to the speaker's childhood and to a former life that has been "sealed away," though the poem doesn't say exactly who they are or what happened.

The tone shifts as it goes. Early lines drip with sarcasm: "lucky you!" and "Good for you!" sound bitter rather than kind. Then the anger sharpens into "How dare you," aimed at a smile the speaker finds painful to see. By the end the bitterness drops away. The speaker admits to envying the other person's strength and resilience, and the final line, "I wish I was happy like you," is quiet and honest. The mood moves from resentment to longing, leaving a sense of vulnerability beneath the anger.

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