hate me,
love me,
do what you want with me,
it is not the town itself,
but the people from whom i want to flee
i'm so deeply apologetic that my own feelings made you feel threatened
she puts her hand on my shoulder
and my heart flutters
it is when i'm reminded that other people think i deserve to die
do i look at her and let out a sigh
she is more beautiful than the sun
and in my heart she could easily win number one
but it is other people's beliefs
that make our fleeting moments brief
people will judge me
they will hate me
I want someone to care about me
in the same way I care about you.
I want someone to memorise little specific things about me
in the same way that i do for you.
I want someone to smile when they know they've made my day a little bit better
in the same way that I do for you.
I want someone to be scared to lose me,
to want to hold me,
to consider risking their life,
to cry themselves to sleep,
to put on a specific perfume,
to write me secret love notes only to never give them,
to think about me as the love interest of their story,
to relate the song to me,
to say that i was their childhood crush,
in the same way i do for you.
Sometimes I think I finally found the one in you.
Sometimes I wonder if you feel it too.
Because when I look at you I don't feel ashamed anymore.
Because when I look at you I see a true friend.
Someone I can trust with heart and soul.
Finally;
Finally my heart feels whole.
You ask me if I am okay when no one else would because no one else notices.
You laugh with me when no one else would because we have jokes in common no one else has.
And I will blush when you look at me.
And I will smile when you look away.
And when you hold me tight,
I can't help but feel like I am on a flight.
First and Last:
You are the first I'm not ashamed of
The first where I feel like I can be myself
Can you hear the endless happiness crying?
Just thinking about you is satisfying
You are the first I think about when I wake up
And the last when I go to sleep again
And there's nothing I would want to change
You are the first I truly adored and loved
With heart and soul;
Thus I ask:
Will you also be the last?
He said,
he got something to say
He is from a million years away..
Before I can even see his face,
I took the quickest way to escape..
Than he asked me my name
And I took that as a threat..
We crossed and fought
In the battle of thoughts
He asked me why
I'm always in rush
I said it's my fault,
I don't trust..
He said maybe he can help me,
I said sorry I'm in hurry..
His eyes made my heart swell
Hardest thing to do is to love someone
Who won't love you back
To be there for someone
Who wasn't there for you
To still see the best in somone
When all they tend to show is the worst..
To sacrifice for the self obsessed,
To cry without making a noise,
To choose someone over yourself,
Who will never choose you for you.
To choose the unworthy,
To give heaven to the devil,
To love someone who loves obsession more than love.
To be a giver for the taker,
To live with a restricted throat,
To neglect your truth,
The days go past
And we don't speak;
We don't write;
We don't chat.
When I am at school,
You are at home.
But when we do talk,
It's just like the old days;
Like it always was.
We pick up where we left off.
Because time doesn't matter;
Distance doesn't matter,
When we're connected by hearts.
For that reason,
We'll always be best friends.
I'm sorry for lying
I'm sorry for stealing
I'm sorry for the hurtful words
I'm sorry for the way I am
I'm sorry for the disrespecting words
I'm sorry for disrespecting people
I'm sorry for hurting you
I'm sorry for starting things
I'm sorry for getting in trouble
I'm sorry for trying to overdose
I'm sorry for breaking your heart
I'm sorry for everything
I'm sorry for my problems
I'm sorry for putting my hands on you
I'm sorry for telling stories
I'm sorry for my life style
Do you remember?
The way you talk to me
The way I talk to you
Only our minds know
Never did we say anything
The way we look at each other
The way we send each other a sign
Only our hearts know
I tried to grant a wish
The way I would only know
The way you would know
Only that is what became of our silence
When your heart is broken
Tears taste like soap
When you cry for people
They taste like the sea
And self-inflicted losses
Like nose bleeds
But when it's all three
You're dead.
Every night she lies awake
Blaming insomnia.
But it's her troubled heart
That keeps her restless.
Wondering if she will ever
Find peace.
Thank you
for all the
smiles you gifted
to me,
and for making
my heart
flutter and squeeze
until the stars
disappeared
into the sunrise.