The tears still shine,
The moon still glows.
They seem brighter,
With tears in my eyes.
When i cry,
a memory of us leaves me,
A memory i wish i had never had,
A memory i wish i shouldnt have to remember.
But know they're nearly all gone,
And soon, very soon they'll be all gone.
And i'll be able to smile,
Without a care in the world
the times i smile,
are the times when your no where to be found.
the times when i'm with another,
the times when i'm with my best friend.
when we can just be us,
when we can just mess around.
But i can't do that when your around.
For once i'm happy,
but then you find away,
away to bring me down,
down to the ground.
where you and me are equal,
where you can cause me pain.
Where i can never be happy.
So long as your around.
So long as your smiling,
I can never smile too
It didnt hurt back then,
but it sure hurts now.
Now that i know i'm leaving,
But not just for a day.
This time i'm leaving for good.
i see you smiling,
and cant help but smile too.
you were my best friend,
but times have changed.
And now your with him.
the man i used too love.
i wish you the best,
and hope you dont get hurt,
the way i did.
Please hold me daddy.
And don’t let go.
Cause I really miss.
You daddy.
More then.
You know.
You said that you.
Would always be there.
By my side, Daddy why.
Did you go?
How come you lied?
Mummy won’t tell me.
I see her cry real late.
At night, she keeps.
Asking for you.
I cried today daddy so.
Sometimes I wish I could escape my mind.
Because my mind is driving me crazy.
Every word it says make me feel less happy, less beautiful and most of all less worthy.
I know I shouldn't listen to the voices in my mind, but there is that one voice that is telling me that maybe it's right what my head says.
Maybe I am disgusting,
Maybe I am a person that everybody hates,
And maybe I am better of dead.
So why not listen to my mind for once,
Would I be better of dead?
And most of all, would I be missed?
I am no good.
No good at everything.
Can't lay in bed all day even with depression.
Can't fullfill my eating disorder to a point where I need to be hospitalized even though I want to.
Because I want to be seen. So instead I cut, cause maybe people will care when they see how bad it is going.
But I am no good at cutting either...
So maybe I need to go to sleep and never wake up again. Maybe that is wat I am good at. And maybe people will finally see the broken me that is hidden behind my always smiling face.
But I know for sure that even if it is a case of life and death, I am no good at it...
Will I ever be good enough??
It started that morning,
When he awoke from the dream.
All his sorrows were seeds.
His town, a fallow field.
Inside his head, it was spring.
Time to plant, the voice hissed.
Mother stood in his way, trying to stop
What he knew must be done.
Time to prune, he thought.
Tools in hand,
He found the place
Where the children were.
The voice roared.
The pulse pounded in his ear.
He would not fail.
It rained
Trapped in between.
Leave or stay.
Leave,
your heart will be broke.
Stay,
my heart will be broke.
I seek with heart and soul
For a shiver of love
To run its bony claws
along my broken spine
my hand reaches
for that shining flame
and my fingers graze
its blazing core
yet I am unable to grasp it
I only burn my fingers