I wrote you a note
And now I'm waiting to hear back.
People don't talk about how scary this is enough.
Maybe I'm just scared because I always start them,
But I never finish the relationship.
My first love told me
She had the wrong sexuality-
Our whole thing was a lie.
My second love was a mistake,
i was willing to give more than I had,
And they wanted more than I could offer.
My family ended that one.
My third love was a cute boy named Joey.
We had everything in common,
But it was just a summer fling.
As you can see,
When we say we love something,
What do we really mean?
Did you mean that 'I love you'
You told your girlfriend,
Your boyfriend,
Your partner?
Or was it just a greeting,
A farewell?
When I say that I love you,
I say it with all my heart.
All my soul.
Because when I love,
I don't do it lightly.
I love you,
All the way,
Or not at all.
You know,
I've never met anyone like you.
We're supposed to be grown up-
(My family constantly reminds me that I'm anything but)
But you chose to stay young.
Why?
What about your youth was so kind to you?
Was it your parents,
Singing you your song?
Or was it something else?
Did you have a friend tell you
Why they wanted to grow up,
And you decided it wasn't worth it?
What the hell is going on in your mind
When I see you staring at the table like that?
Are you remembering something you love?
hey.
did i do it again?
ruin a friendship?
you didn't nod hello at me like normal.
i guess i started it,
cuz i did my thing-
my 'im in another mood' thing,
my 'give everyone the cold shoulder' thing.
my 'fuck everything up' thing.
i dont want to fuck this up-
i dont want to lose you-
i cant be alone anymore-
dont let me lose you-
dont let me-
dont let-
dont.
I'm so sick of myself
For being afraid of you.
I swear to god, it's annoying.
But I can't help the things I do.
Hey, do you mind if I kiss you?
It's fine if you tell me no.
I just want to see how it feels.
(And those lips will NOT be just for show.)
Do you mind if I hug you?
I'm reliant on physical touch.
Your arms look very welcoming-
We won't have to hug all that much.
Do you mind if I love you?
It's too late to say I can't.
Cause I fell hard and I fell fast.
When it comes to you, I could go on a rant.
I have 13 poems about you-
That's definitely way too much.
Good thing you terrify me,
Or I'd let you read them all during lunch.
Maybe I should share some-
Is this number 14?
This is how I know
With you I have a thing.
If I thought I was in love
With anybody the past 2 grades,
This is my wake-up slap.
Hey, can you never go away?
Has anyone told you you're cool?
No, I bet they don't
Cause I'm the only one who sees you.
It's a shame I'm all alone
Can I tell you something?
You mean the world to me,
You're never off my mind,
I love you for everything you let me know,
And everything I'm yet to ask.
I love how you look when I speak,
How you hear the words I say,
How you think and then respond,
How you treat me like an equal.
I love how you joke with me,
You talk with, not to me,
You answer no matter how strange-
I ask a lot of strange-
I want to meet your family,
Want you to meet mine,
Want to see you eating dinner
If I awoke inside your body,
I'd treat it with such care.
I'd be so gentle with it,
You'd never know I had been there.
This is not a message for just one person,
But a call to those in need.
If you ever think that you are not pretty
Just know you're the prettiest to me.
I'd take a liking to your body-
Surely it's better than mine.
But please, oh please remember
To love yourself all the time.
Yes, my hair's a little too messy
And my eyes a bit askew.
If I awoke as you and we looked the same
I'd still love your body for and with you.
Do your eyes follow me
The way mine follow you?
I know sometimes you watch me,
I don't really mind, you know.
Since the day we started talking
My smile's almost always on.
And I see you smiling too
So let's make a pact to never be alone.
You think before you answer,
Which lets me know you hear.
Cause I'm the middle child so nobody cares to see
Just what it is I'm thinking
But you listen to me.
I'm glad we had that fire drill,
The one that gave me the courage to talk to you.
Cause you've become the best part of everyday
He ignores you,
Yet you like him.
He does nothing,
Yet you fall for him.
He never speaks to you,
Yet you dream of him.
He doesn't think of you,
Yet you've given your heart to him?
My eyes could not see it
My ears could not hear it
My fingers could not touch it
But I knew it was there
The same way you know the sun will rise again
The way winter will melt into spring
The way the wave will always beat on the sand
Because even if something is not evident
It is still there
Lurking in the shadows
Of pride
Of ego
Of distance
But all of these things can be overcome
If you allow it
For even though
Dear heart,
Why,
Why the asshole,
Who doesn't respect my feelings,
Gets more than half my heart,
Why does the guy,
Who has everything I am,
Have to be a jerk,
And throw me around,
Why do I have to care,
I know that I didn't choose him,
But you did,
You chose him,