In the owl’s flight
as in the conifers it left:
that silence.
It’s enormous,
the frozen carcass of a cow
eaten by chickadees.
O trees like forks,
the sky too is a dish
best served cold.
Mouthpiece
for the body’s instrument.
Its silence is another language.
Mountain peak.
It makes its own
wet weather.
Mouse-pink
& sensitive as a newborn
through old age.
Missed bit
of a continent submerged
in the unconscious.
Mouthpiece.
The scuba diver
can’t speak.
I feel so little
I feel so weak
His words sting
My cheeks feel hot, but my face is pale.
My eyes are blurry I can not see
My heart is beating as if a swarm of bees were attacking me I think that's why it stings
My bones are brittle they're easy to break
My head needs clearing I can't think.
My hands are shaking I can't even write.
It's loud in this room, people are yelling, people are screaming at me. Everyone is crying or maybe that's just the voices in my head, telling me that I need some sense
He makes me feel so little
I keep apologizing hoping that he understands I mean it. Hoping he will notice that I'm sorry. I don't know what I did wrong but I know a sorry it to come from me.
Stay quiet
sipping your beer
torture with violence
while im here
suffering in silence
If I could love you,
You'd see how much I can really care.
You'd watch as my lips broke into a smile,
See my eyes filled up with joy upon hearing your name.
I'd always be there for you,
Or not be there if that's what you needed.
I'd let you sit with me in silence,
Or I'd ask you all the questions.
If I could love you,
I'd never let you get upset.
If I saw you looking down,
I'd say your name in that tone,
That 'I'll listen if you need me to' one.
If I could love you,
I'd let you use me as a punching bag.
I'd stand there with you,
Maybe I don't cry, but I hurt
Maybe I won't say, but I feel
Maybe I don't show, but I care
If
If I
If I told
If I told you
If I told you how
If I told you how I
If I told you how I really
If I told you how I really felt
If I told you how I really felt
If I told you how I really
If I told you how I how
If I told you how i
If I told you how
If I told you
If I told
If I
the love i know ebbs and flows
four days of bliss
three of bitter arguments
seven of physical violence
one of concerned neighbors
two of police check-ins
and months of no communication
until it restarts again and again and again
my heart has conversations with you every day
holding on for what could have been
even as this silence fills the space between us
I remember all the silence in presence
I remember the scene, i never like the closure
I remember your eyes of insults ignored
I remember the abstract of cruelty
I remember when the missed speaks
I remember the irreplaceable victimize
I remember the dried commitments
I remember the aesthetic shadows
I remember love turns to dust
I remember when the skies cry
I remember the salt air
I remember your whispers that haunts me
I remember he is lost in the memory
I remember youre not mine like a wine
I remember back in December of colds
I remember in November of ghosts
The winter air cold touches my skin
The road with no crowded people
The birds flying away
The red roses displayed
And when I touch my finger bleed
So I drop my blood in the water
I see the Christmas lights sparkle
The branches with snows on
My hair flaws when the wind breezes
I sit on a bench alone
I started to write my love poems
My silence...
My name is blue paint, cracked, peeling
I know all too well - that fickle feeling
and all the cracks on that musty ceiling.
My name is echoes of a time gone by
I can't ignore, though I may try
-shadows that might never die.
My name is silence, empty, fleeting
broken only by muffled eating
and sagging in that eternal seating.
My name is lost, forgotten, old
and really would rather not be told
lest it remind of that rotten hold.
My name is breathing, heavy, strained
-an unsettled joy now forever stained
by feelings that have since remained.
My name is hunger, hatred, unrefined