you left me
Left me sitting in the dark
Sitting alone with these horrid thoughts
how could you?
I trusted you.
trusted you with my life.
but maybe that was my biggest mistake.
who knows?
I knew i shouldnt have fell for it
shouldnt have fell for your false love
father why must you leave me
wherever will i go?
now your light isnt there
Man i shouldve bought a lamp
But no, i thought i could trust you
Now I have no guide in this dark sea.
Your love is like the stars
It gives light in the night sky
Gives hope in my broken piece
And shines in my darkest times
Your love is like a dust
Slowly fading away
Carried by the wind
And have no plans to come back
Your love is like a star
But it easily faded and turn into dust.
the cold water pours down on me
but i can't feel anything
because the tingles come from within where it's fighting
at this point im completely numb
the numb overcomes my body;
i can't see, can't feel, can't hear
can't touch or smell either
it's funny how one second i was crying
and another i was just like another monster
another robot
another feelingless person
it was like it didn't mean anything to me
but you didn't know how much it did
i felt myself being pulled into the void of numbness
one second i was moving
and the next it was like i had faded into nothing
drops of water fall on my outstretched hand
i sat waiting for the rain to land
the falling of rain was like you and me
memories out in the open for us to see
the rain dried up, the essence never did
i cried but you never batted an eyelid
i was heartbroken, didn't you know?
no, you were too busy watching the snow.
i looked at you with tears in my eyes
did you care? no, all you ever told was lies.
i wish it was like rain, that could be wiped away
but truth is i'll remember. at least for another day.
you have absolutely no idea what you did to me,
you always said the rainbow would come but i can't see
well alas, let the rain wash me away
i don't care if i see you another day
I sent you an apology letter,
And I sent it to my self,
I reread it in my sleeping hours,
And deep into the night,
I wrote you an apology letter,
But I had not guts to send,
So I kept in my fist that day,
And you never got to see,
I wrote you an apology letter,
But I also wrote one to me,
Saying sorry I had to leave,
But my mind wouldn't agree,
I wrote you an apology letter,
And this one I did send,
But two days later it came back,
And your mind was made up about me
For the record,
I didn't stop crying over your loss,
I ran out of tears,
I'm as dry as a drought in the Sahara dessert,
Because I will never get over the fact that you are gone,
Like debris from an earthquake,
Like a glass half empty,
Like a candle burning oxygen.
I didn't grieve and forget your absence,
Because one doesn't forget a great love,
They are trapped and strangled by it,
Until the noose is finally cut,
And you are free to go,
Like a bird forced from it's nest,
Like a balloon lost from the grip of the needy child,
Like the smoke from the candle burning oxygen.
The hollowness inside of me is almost too much to bear.
I can hear my heart beating in dead of night,
It goes up and down as if it were a machine,
There is no real purpose for it.
But still the monotonous organ beats on,
In a metallic and drudging fashion.
Don't whisper in my ear,
The sweet things you did before,
Nothing practical to hear,
Just the thick lies,
Pouring from your mouth like the blood in my heart,
And the sorrow of your good byes,
Don't tell you still care for me,
'Cause I'm a would've been,
Should've been,
Never was,
And never ever will be,
Twas the first lie you bled,
Packing up and leaving my side,
Which has to be sewn up with the thread of threads,
For you made me lose my confident stride,
I might as well be dead,
Water is stationary.
It is still.
Not alive.
I was one with the water.
In the land before time.
I would rest,
In Peace,
But now I rest in peices,
And instead of an oyster,
The world is my grave,
And you get out soon,
If you behave,
If the words of a book were real,
Instead of lies,
The grave would burst with life,
And I would be alive,
If you venture by an orphanage,
You see things that you can't erase,
You see dolls gazing out of windows,
And the broken firetrucks the decorate the yard,
You see the pillows yellow with tear stains,
And shoelaces forever to be untied,
You see kids with hollow faces,
You see plates with food untouched,
You see desperation and depression,
On the face of an unforgiving child,
You see girls with pertty pig tails,
With ribbons in their hair,
You see boys with messy faces,
With striped button shirts to thier necks.
The button shirts are a chokehole,
That keeps them in their jail,
Drop
Drops,
Drops on the floor,
On my window sill,
Rolling off the shingles,
Splatting on the door,
Bursting on the tiles,
Tearing at the scenes,
Numbing out the pain,
Hiding away the screams.
I was told it wasn't healthy,
Being in somewhere that doesn't make me happy,
But I used to enjoy it,
I just didn't like the people,
I meant the person,
I thought that it would get better,
But every day I would be depressed,
Upset,
Deflated,
And dull,
I was told it wasn't healthy,
But I never wished it would end,
Maybe it's for the best,
But then again,
Maybe it's not.